Get It Dunn Blog

5 Things I Learned in the 100 Day Challenge of 2012

Deb — Tue, 15 May 2012 16:14:12 +0000

Today is the final day – Day 100 – in the 100 Day Challenge and I thought I would share some of the things that I learned during the challenge this year. 100 days is a very long time to commit to something new and if you are paying attention, the process can open your eyes to your strengths and your weaknesses and all interesting attributes in between! My challenge was to write everyday and here is what I noticed:

Creative writing takes time – you can’t just dash off amazing stuff the minute you sit down to write. I needed to make more time for my challenge and not expect to have beautiful words and stories pouring out of me without, at least, warming up! Did you make time for your challenge? Do you leave some space in your days so that you can deal with unexpected challenges?
Sometimes you have to adjust your expectations. Expecting myself to do creative writing every single day was not realistic with the rest of my schedule. The added pressure I put on myself had me dreading the challenge instead of enjoying it so I gave myself the option of a variety of different writing. Did you adjust your challenge this year? Do you allow yourself the option of adjusting when things in your life get too hard or do you just put your head down and push through?
Giving yourself permission to adjust when things are too hard can actually make you more productive. Once I let myself change the kind of writing I was doing, I noticed that I started to write poems as well as stories and that my newsletter topics flowed easily as well as emails and some of my marketing materials. Do you get too rigid in your thinking or approach?
Challenges can be scary. Well, not the challenge per se but what the challenge can bring out in you. This challenge brought out all the scary inner critics that like to show up when I am trying something new. All my doubts about being enough reared their ugly little heads …”are you really going to write that?”….”that sounds stupid”….”who would ever read that”…”ha, that’s not the way a story should be written”…. Setting out on a challenge is a great way to make the inner critic surface and there were days when it was more of a challenge to deal with the critic than to do the writing! Have you ever encountered one of these critics? Do you listen to them and let them stop you or do you kick them to the curb?
Being gentle with yourself makes you stronger. There were days that I missed doing my daily challenge. Completely went out of my mind and I didn’t even think about it until the next day. The first few times it happened, I wasn’t so kind to myself, especially because I knew that all of you were “watching.” My drive to do the challenge perfectly even had me being untruthful with myself. I caught myself trying to rationalize that answering an email counted as my writing for the day! But being hard on myself didn’t make the challenge easier or help me stay on track – it made it harder. That’s when I realized that I needed to regroup and try a little compassion. I started to acknowledge what I did accomplish and all the times I did do my challenge everyday and I gradually came to realize that the more compassionate I was with myself, the better I got at sticking with the challenge every day. Did you beat yourself down because you missed a few days or because you started the challenge but didn’t keep it up? Do you give yourself a hard time in other areas of your life thinking that will motivate you to do better?

Participating in the 100 Day Challenge takes courage, perseverance and gentleness. Sometimes you have to make adjustments and lots of times you need support. It’s not easy to do on your own so I want to say thank you to all of you who participated, who watched from the sidelines, who commented and who cheered us on…I am grateful for such an open, supportive and joyful community. I will be celebrating the end of the challenge with all of this in mind. I encourage you to celebrate too – whether you did 10 days, 50 days or 100 days please make sure to acknowledge what you did because you are AWESOME and are worthy of acknowledgement!

Joyfully,

Deb

Delighting the Senses

Deb — Thu, 03 May 2012 12:00:54 +0000

When was the last time that you tasted something that was absolutely delicious? Note that I said tasted, not ate. Do you stop to take in the flavors and textures of the food that you eat or do you quickly shove the food in your mouth while you check your emails, organize the kids and clean up the kitchen?

What about receiving a hug? Do you revel in the feeling of being touched and held or do you give a quick, one armed bump of the shoulders with a brisk pat on the back and race off to the next item on your to do list? Of course I realize there are exceptions (your mail carrier might be a bit shocked by a lingering hug) but my question is…are you taking time to delight your senses?

The dessert I’m eating (pictured to the left) inspired this topic because I was reminded of the value of truly taking time to enjoy. Not just the food but everything around me – the music, my friend’s company, the smell of the wine, and even the weight of the fork in my hand. I realized that it had been quite some time since I had given my senses anything to be joyful about.

Paying attention to your senses keeps you in the present moment and being present is the only way that you can access your power and your joy. When a client tells me they are feeling stuck my first question is, “in what ways are you numbing yourself?” Whether it’s not physically feeling pain, avoiding an emotion or not opening your eyes to the truth that is in front of you, tuning out your senses is a sure fire way to get stuck in life. The remedy? Start finding ways to delight your senses. Surround yourself with beautiful sounds, eat foods with pleasing textures, spices and flavors, make a point of looking at gorgeous and inspiring images, tickle your nose with delicious scents, wear sensuous fabrics next to your skin or combine your senses with an aromatherapy massage….there are so many options but the joy is in making a point to give your senses something to sing about everyday. You and everyone around you will be better for it!

Confidence Can Be Arranged!

Deb — Fri, 06 Apr 2012 02:52:38 +0000

I stood on the edge of the platform and leaned out to grab the trapeze. The instructor held onto my harness and said “now let go of the safety bar and grab the trapeze with your other hand.” Every cell in my body screamed “DO NOT LET GO OF THE SAFETY BAR!!” I replied to my instructor in a shaky voice, “I don’t think I can let go.”

“Yes you can,” he responded with complete confidence.

So I let go, grabbed the trapeze and on his signal I jumped off the platform, swinging on the trapeze attempting (unsuccessfully) to do the routine I had been instructed to do. As I landed in the safety net my instructor called out that I had failed miserably and that I would have to do it again! The combination of fear and adrenaline coursing through my body coupled with the amount of physical strength (that I clearly didn’t possess) required for the task made me laugh nervously and say “I don’t think I can do it – it’s too hard.”

Then he leaned toward me, looked me in the eyes and said “You can do this, now go climb up that ladder and do it.”

Body trembling with fear and muscle fatigue, I turned around and climbed up the ladder to the platform. This time I leaped off the platform and performed the routine as instructed! Success! One step closer to joining the circus!!

Have you ever limited yourself because you didn’t have the confidence that you would be successful? Maybe the fear of being humiliated, looking foolish, getting bad news or being physically injured was so overpowering that your confidence in yourself disappeared faster than candy at a child’s birthday party. Increasing confidence is a big part of what I help my clients with – confidence to change jobs, leave or start a relationship, try something new, pursue their dreams or simply to live their life the way they want to live it.

Lack of confidence is no reason to limit yourself. Just because you don’t have it doesn’t mean you are doomed to never take the leap into what you want. Confidence can be arranged. The trapeze instructor had enough confidence in me to fuel me for my second attempt. My trainer at the gym gives me an exercise that I am convinced I won’t be able to do. She’s so confident that I try it and to my amazement, I am successful. It’s what I do with my clients – hold unwavering confidence in them until they have cultivated the confidence to do everything they have ever wanted to do.

Whether you are unsure about changing your job, worried about going for your medical test results, or afraid of speaking up for yourself, confidence can be arranged and you have the power to arrange whatever you need. How’s that for confidence?!

Can You Take a Break from Challenge?

Deb — Fri, 30 Mar 2012 18:07:48 +0000

Recently I was fortunate to take a trip to the Bahamas. The trip had been planned for months but inevitably, there was much rushing around at the last minute to take care of everything that needed taking care of in order for me to be away for a week. In the old days, I would try to do everything, running myself down in the process and arrive on my holiday completely exhausted. I’m getting better at discerning what the priorities really are before I go away and this past month I got even better!

Because we are in the 100 Day Challenge right now, doing my 100 Day activity (writing) every day became unmanageable. After a few days of completely forgetting to do the challenge (and then beating myself up for forgetting) it occurred to me that perhaps I needed a different approach. Perhaps I could take a break. Hhmmm…take a break from a commitment….what would people say, what would the other participants think, what would become of my challenge if I took a break??? The idea was intriguing enough that I decided to experiment. I gave myself permission to put the 100 Day Challenge on a short 5 day break with the intention of returning to the challenge once I had departed for my holiday.

What relief!! It may not seem like a big deal to you but the 100 Day Challenge is a commitment that I make to myself and to my community of clients and followers. It’s important to me that I do my best to stick with it so that I can inspire others to do the same. Taking a break seemed to go against all the rules! And…it worked. It actually gave me more time – not just because there was one less thing on my to do list, but because all the energy I invested in beating myself up for missing a day or in trying to figure out a better system was also freed up. So often, it’s not the number of things on our to do list that drains our energy, it’s the amount of energy we spend thinking about and resisting the items on the to do list.

Can you give yourself a break from your challenges? Just for a few minutes or maybe a day or two? What new perspective could you bring to your challenges if you had a break? Can you give yourself a break from thinking about your challenges – just for a little while? Give your mind the space to explore something delightful or intriguing and notice if that doesn’t change your day, just a little bit! What do you think? Share your thoughts here!

Joyfully,

Deb

Who Do You Think You Are?

Deb — Fri, 02 Mar 2012 18:51:37 +0000

“Who do you think you are?”

Did anyone ever say this to you? This question is often posed in an attempt to “put you in your place,” a place of shrinking, hiding or covering up your natural expression of your strengths and talents. There is some idea that if you are too confident, too sure of yourself or too fearless it’s going to go to your head and you will be some egotistical narcissist – and nobody wants that….

I can’t imagine this happening. Most of the people that I know and have worked with over the last 25 years are so unlikely to become “full of themselves” it’s laughable. A colleague in my Mastermind group said to me “I think that instead of shrinking us this question should expand us” and I agree with her. Who do you think you are?

Do you know who you are? Are you strong, compassionate, a lover of chocolate? Do you get excited about NASCAR, irate that 100’s of children go to school without breakfast, weepy over Hallmark commercials? Do you know that you are extraordinary, beautiful and courageous (you are…don’t even try to argue with me on this one!)? Sometimes we are not sure who we are because we have been told too many times who we should be which means that our authentic selves often get lost. Isn’t it time for you to know who you are again?

What I can tell you is that knowing who you are makes you stronger, healthier and more powerful. You make better decisions, develop the ability to say no and set boundaries and are able to create more time and energy for yourself and the people you love. Doesn’t that sound delightful?

Who do you think you are?!

Course Correction!

Deb — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 04:11:58 +0000

We are just over two weeks into the 100 Day Challenge and I think I need a course correction! The challenge I set out for myself was to write everyday for a minimum of 10 minutes. The writing had to be non work related writing because I spend so much of my time writing for my website, newsletter, blog, clients, etc.

I didn’t realize how hard this was going to be for me and I am finding that the writing gets left until the end of my day which is when I am tired, uninspired and wanting to go to bed. Hhmm, not as much fun as I anticipated! Time for an adjustment.

This is an important point about the 100 Day Challenge…just because you started out with a great idea and a plan doesn’t mean that you can’t adjust the idea and the plan as you go along. This is true about so many parts of our lives (not just the 100 Day Challenge). Sometimes we will set a goal or get an idea in our mind that things have to be exactly the way we first set them out to be and when it doesn’t seem to be working out the way we thought, we will abandon the idea or give up on the goal. While giving up may relieve some of the initial pressure, we will often end up feeling bad or disappointed that we didn’t achieve our goal.

When my clients reach this giving up stage, it gives us the opportunity to rekindle the original desire for the goal and then make some adjustments (or course correct) so that they can move forward with a more manageable goal or plan.

As for me, I am going to change my challenge slightly by adjusting the kind of writing from non work related to having 2 -3 days out of the week being work related writing and the rest of the week will be for the stories, poems, etc that I have been playing with. This way, I can use the days of the week where I have more space in my schedule for the non work writing which will make it less of an obligation and put the joy back in my challenge.

How about you? What do you do when your goals prove to be a bit too challenging? Have you had to make any adjustments to your 100 Day Challenge yet? Feel free to share your experiences here so that we can all learn together!

Joyfully,

Deb

And They’re Off…!

Deb — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 21:03:52 +0000

It has become a tradition at Get It Dunn that every February marks the start of the 100 Day Challenge. It’s a free program that is offered for the clients, newsletter subscribers, Facebook fans and Twitter followers of Get It Dunn. Participants are encouraged to choose an activity that will improve their life in some way, either by adding something new or letting go of something that doesn’t serve them well anymore. The challenge is to do that activity every day for 100 Days…in a row….no breaks…no weekends off….every single day! This can sound intimidating and it’s supposed to – it’s a challenge! It takes dedication, commitment and a strong desire to change your life and the 100 Day Challenge provides the environment for learning how to make a change in small, manageable steps. When participants look back at the end of the challenge, they can not only see what they have accomplished but they are also amazed to reflect on what they have learned about themselves.

Over the last four years Challengers have written e-books and books, improved their health, increased their upper body strength, cut sugar out of their diet, added fruit to their diet, walked for miles, trained for marathons, cleared clutter out of their home, developed a new hobby, created works of art, rid their lives and homes of tolerations, created a culture of gratitude, got more rest and cultivated a meditation practice – to mention a few! We usually end the challenge with less participants than we start with and I know that regardless of how long people last in the challenge, they always find it a valuable experience.

Just before we kicked off the 100 Day Challenge, I was meeting with my mastermind group and I was challenging the members to participate. One of the participants was hesitant not because she didn’t think she could do it but because doing one activity for 100 Days would cause her to lose interest. She is a person who loves variety and has a gift for taking things from concept to implementation very quickly. So, we devised a way for her to participate in the structure of the challenge but still in a way that aligned with her authenticity. She has decided to do a number of time sensitive projects – 72 hour challenges – within the 100 Day Challenge all of which will lead to the accomplishment of a larger goal in her business. Another mastermind colleague has decided to join us and has made the public declaration on her blog (http://marketingsoapbox.com/) so that she will be even more accountable for doing her challenge every day. Check out her blog as she mentions a few other ways to structure your challenge that may be of interest to you.

However you choose to participate, I welcome you to the challenge with open arms (or open blog..!) and hope that you will enjoy being a part of this awesome community of people who like to play bigger! It’s not too late to join the challenge and if you want to be included in the reminder/support emails, head over to my sign up page (http://www.getitdunn.ca/2012/02/06/100-day-challenge/) and you’ll be added to the list. Just one of the ways that you can be sure to get through the challenge with more joy!

Any questions or comments? Leave them here and remember to check back often to read about how we are doing throughout the challenge!

Joyfully,

Deb

Help…I Need Somebody!

Deb — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 20:40:59 +0000

“Would you like some help out with your groceries today?”

This was the question that I was waiting for as I paid for my groceries. I was recovering from major surgery and had just started getting slowly back into my usual routines. I was under strict instructions to keep the walking to a minimum and definitely no heavy lifting. So, for the first time in my life, I needed help with getting my groceries into my car and today I planned to say “yes” when the clerk asked. She didn’t ask. Guess what I did next? I pushed my cart out of the store and then proceeded to unpack the grocery bags, one item at a time, until the bag was light enough for me to lift. Then, I repacked the bags that were now in my car, one item at a time.

I’m not proud of this story but I am sharing it to make a point. The point is, it’s time for us to start asking for help. Most of us don’t ask for help – heck, most of us don’t even accept help when it’s offered. But not asking for or not accepting help is making life much harder than it needs to be (if life needs to be hard at all).

I know, I know…I can hear you already….”but Deb, if I ask for help, I’ll look weak…I’ll lose my independence…it makes me vulnerable…then I’ll be indebted to them and what if I can’t pay them back…what if they say no….it’s faster if I do it myself…” I have heard every excuse in the book about why you can’t/shouldn’t/won’t ask for help and here is what I have to say about each one:

“It takes a strong person to know when they need help and to ask for it. We are not meant to be independent but rather interdependent – why do you think there are other people on the planet?? With all of these people on the planet, we need some way to connect and build relationships and we can’t build any deep or satisfying relationships without being vulnerable. People don’t help others just to get something in return, they help because it makes them feel good and lets them use their skills and strengths. Wouldn’t you like to help others feel good? It’s pretty rare that someone would say no to helping you – don’t you usually help others when you are asked? If they do say no, it’s not because you are a bad, weak or needy person, it’s because they just aren’t able to help. In the long run most things take longer to do by yourself and require more energy so getting help will give you more time and energy that you can use to do something fun!”

I have more responses for anyone who feels uncomfortable asking for help but the main reason that most people don’t ask for help has to do with self worth and deserving. You are worthy and deserving of having an inspiring and joyful life and if you still think you have a good reason that you can’t ask for help, leave your below and I’ll help you see a different perspective!

I Resolve…Not to Resolve!

Deb — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 16:49:20 +0000

It’s the start of a whole new year! It’s a clean slate that awaits your first mark – your intentions, desires, hopes, dreams and goals for the coming year. It’s a time that is classically reserved for resolving that your life will be different this year – that you will lose the weight, get in shape, improve your relationships, get out of debt and get organized! Phew…that’s quite a list!

Does it sound familiar? Do you find yourself making the same resolutions every year only to discover that you haven’t achieved them yet again by year’s end? The resolutions I listed are among the top 10 most popular and at their essence, there is nothing wrong with them. However, from my perspective, there is an implication that you are lacki ng in some way. Instead of starting your year thinking that you have to “fix” yourself, why not consider that you are already perfect, whole and enough? Instead of setting goals that require you to maintain a will of steel 24/7, why not engage the energy of joy and inspiration?

I used to set resolutions with great enthusiasm and hope only to realize that a few months into the year I had strayed from my resolve. This straying lead to beating myself up for lack of discipline, feeling like a failure and giving up on being able to have the life I wanted. Whoo hoo…happy new year to me!! Then the day finally came when I realized that all of this beating up, struggling and not being enough was making me miserable. That’s when I decided that I needed more joy in my life, not more hard work, more will power or more discipline.

A more joyful way to begin the New Year emerged when I began choosing a theme for the year. Last year my theme was The Incredible Lightness of Being and I had a year filled with lightness, joy and managed to lift an incredible weight off my shoulders. I danced more, traveled more, spent more time with friends, make some delightful new friends, lightened my workload, reduced my obligations, lost some weight and improved my health. Mission Accomplished!

This year my theme is Boldness of Being! This theme thrills me and scares me at the same time which tells me there is good energy in this theme, energy that will fuel me all year long, not just for the first few months.

I highly recommend that you try this approach. Choose a theme for your year – a word or a phrase that makes your blood move, makes you a little bit uncomfortable and most importantly, that makes you giggle like a little child with a yummy secret!

To make it even yummier, send me an email before January 31 with 2012 Theme in the message line, tell me your theme and I’ll enter your name in a draw for a deck of my Reconnect to Yourself Cards.

What is your experience with New Year’s resolutions? Do they work for you? Does the thought of a theme change anything for you? Share your thoughts with me on the blog.

Happy New Year!

Time to Slow Down!

Deb — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 18:51:50 +0000

Where I live, the days are getting shorter and the hours of darkness are increasing. It is also getting colder…much colder! This is the time of year when you can see Mother Nature slowing down. Several of the birds have left for warmer climates and the animals are moving into hibernation mode. Everything in our natural environment is slowing down.

Except humans! This is the time of year when we try to go, as my friend said, “faster than the speed of light.” Who can blame you? You are in an environment that bombards you with advertising, pressure to buy more, invitations to parties, plans for holidays and children who are wound up tighter than a drum with excitement. This environment can be very hard to ignore. The strategy that most people employ to keep up with everything is to try to go even faster. It can be a crazy, stressful, pressure filled time of year.

Or it can be a peaceful, inspired, magical time of year. Nature slows down for a reason. Continuous growth and movement is not balanced and it is not sustainable - for nature or for you. More hours of darkness invite you to sleep longer, a blanket of snow implies that you need to curl up under your own blanket and rest and even the animals are moving slowly and gently through the woods, if they are moving at all. There is stillness in nature that invites you to slow down, connect and go inside. By taking a few moments to align yourself with the energy of nature you will connect with a deeper energy that is sustainable and that will support you as you move through the month of December. You may choose to attend all the festivities and take part in all the preparations but it will be from a place of connection rather than a place of franticness. Take a few moments everyday and observe the nature around you. As you rush from place to place, notice the trees, appreciate the sky and listen for the quiet. Connecting with your natural environment in small ways everyday will shift your whole experience. I am wishing all of you a month of connection, peace and magic!